Sex and Relationship Education and Therapy for Individuals, Couples online and in-person Brighton

Let's talk about the thing everyone's
thinking and nobody's saying out loud

Mismatched desire, pain, shame, identity, the sex life you were promised versus the one you've actually got, I work with individuals and couples on all of it. No judgement, no clinical detachment.

You don't need the perfect words. You just need to start.

Spaces are limited and offered via the waitlist, pop your name down and I'll be in touch when one opens.

Nikki Scott, sex therapist and founder of The Sex Ed Club, Brighton

My therapy Style

I'm direct, warm, and I'll probably make you laugh at some point, usually about the dismantling or contradictions of society, sex and self.

But underneath the humour, my approach is political. I don't think that's a controversial thing to admit, every therapist works from a worldview, most just don't tell you what theirs is. Here's mine:

Queer theory shapes how I think about identity and desire, as things that move, rather than boxes you get sorted into once and stay in forever. I won't assume your body, your relationship structure, or your desire should look a certain way to be valid.

Intersectional feminism means I never look at your sex life in isolation. Race, class, disability, culture, migration, gender, these all shape the messages you were given about your body long before you had any say in it. Good therapy has to hold all of that, not just the bit that happens in bed.

Anti-colonial thinking means questioning whose idea of "normal" sex, relationships, or bodies we've all inherited, often White, Western, heteronormative ones, and making room for yours instead.

Anti-capitalist means I don't believe intimacy is a productivity project. You don't need to optimise your sex life, hit targets, or perform healing on a deadline. Some sessions we'll do deep work. Some we'll just tell the truth about how tired you are. Both count.

None of this means therapy with me is a lecture. I've spent my career teaching, and if there's one thing teaching taught me, it's that people learn best when they're not being talked at. So expect conversation, not a syllabus, I just wanted you to know what's underneath it.

Low or mismatched libido

Sexual & performance anxiety

Couples & Intimate Partner Therapy

psychosexual & relationship issues I can help with

Pain during sex

Vaginismus & Vulvodynia

Intimacy & emotional connection

Sexual identity & exploration

Kink & Fetish

Sex Education for Midlife

LGBTQIA+ affirming therapy

Compulsive sexual behaviour

Sexual shame

Desire that's changed shape, perimenopause, menopause, ageing bodies, or just life Sex after a long relationship, after kids, after loss, after everything changing at once Rebuilding intimacy at 40, 50, 60+ on your terms, not a 25-year-old's

Couples sex & relationships Therapy in Brighton

As an intersectional feminist, anti-capitalist, COSRT registered sex and relationship therapist based in Brighton, I work with couples and multi-parterned people to untangle the pressures that get in the way of a fulfilling sex life. 

So much of what we're taught about sex and intimacy in long term relationships comes from narrow, commercialised, and often heteronormative scripts, ones that ignore how race, class, disability, gender identity, and sexuality shape our experiences of desire and connection. 

My practice actively pushes back against these scripts. I don't believe there's a "normal" amount of sex a couple should be having, or a fixed template for what healthy intimacy looks like. Instead, I help couples understand their own unique dynamic, free from capitalist ideas of performance, productivity, and comparison.

Much of my work centres on mismatched desire and low libido, two of the most common (and most misunderstood) issues couples bring to therapy. 

Rather than pathologising the partner with "lower" desire, I help couples explore the wider context: stress, body image, trauma, power dynamics, mental load, and the impact of hormonal changes. This is especially relevant for couples navigating sex after children, when exhaustion, identity shifts, and the unequal distribution of domestic and emotional labour can profoundly affect intimacy. 

I work with couples to rebuild connection on their own terms, not by chasing an idealised version of what sex "should" look like.

Therapy with me is collaborative, non-judgemental, and rooted in the belief that better sex and intimacy in long term relationships come from honest communication, mutual respect, and challenging the systems, patriarchy, capitalism, ableism, that so often shape our shame and expectations around sex. If you're in Brighton or working with me online, I'd love to support you and your partner in finding a way of relating that actually works for you.

How I work as a sex and relationship therapist

I'm not neutral, and I don't think good therapists ever really are.

My work is queer-affirming and intersectional feminist by default, not as an add-on. That means I look at your sex life in context, your body, your history, your culture, your class, the messages you were handed before you had any say in the matter. I trained as an educator before I trained as a therapist, and I've lived and worked abroad, so I don't assume there's one "normal" way to have a relationship or a body.

I also don't believe good sex or a good relationship is something you buy your way into. My job isn't to sell you a fixed version of intimacy, it's to help you find yours.

WHAT TO EXPECT

Starting therapy can feel daunting, sometimes overwhelming, so well done for getting this far.

A good connection between client and therapist is one of the biggest predictors of whether therapy actually works. So take your time, read my bio, have a look at my Instagram, and get a feel for whether my approach fits what you're looking for.

Once you think we might be a good match, reach out via the form at the bottom of this page and we'll book in an initial session. This first session isn't really about the detail of what's brought you here, it's about whether we can genuinely connect. I'll explain more about how I work, we'll talk through what therapy means to you, and we'll start to shape what you want from this process and how we might build that together. Sessions run 50 or 75 minutes, and to be completely clear, you will never be asked to undress or take part in any sexual activity. This is a talking therapy, exclusively.

To keep things safe and in line with COSRT's ethical framework, I'll ask you to complete three forms, a contract, registration, and a privacy policy, and to make payment ahead of our first session. If you're joining online, I'll send your video link once these are in. If you're coming in person, I'd ask that everything's completed at least 24 hours beforehand.

Sex therapy session environment at The Sex Ed Club, Brighton – inclusive therapy for women and LGBTQIA+ clients

Questions answered.

sex TherApy enquiry

I work with a small, deliberate caseload, 10 spaces at a time, across individual and couples work, because this kind of therapy deserves real attention, not a conveyor belt.

When a space opens, waitlist members are offered it first, in order.

Good things are worth waiting for and so are you.

Pop your details below and I'll reach out as soon as I have availability.

Your details are kept strictly confidential and never shared. GDPR compliant.

All sessions are led by Nikki Scott, a COSRT registered sex and reltionship therapist and sex educator with an MA from the University of Sussex and a background spanning therapy, education and international development.